Out of the Ashes

Almost every morning, upon arising, the chore of taking out the ashes awaits me.
Living in Manitoba with a wood stove...you understand why.
It is burning day and night.
Constantly.
Perpetually.
It is cold.
Here.
Kelly stop laughing.

Burning that much wood ...the ashes build up quickly.
Although by 7am it seem that it is all ash, as I shovel it out into our 5 gallon pail, there are always embers remaining. Not once have I awoken to find the fire completely gone out.

That gives me hope.

The dawn this morning was incredible...scarlet and flaming pink filled the sky.
The taller trees on our property are swaying in the wind...and the wind is warmer than usual.
The weather report for the following two weeks looks promising ( fingers crossed). It seems as if we will be getting the proverbial January thaw.

Dare I hope?

In the Book Hinds Feet on High Places ( Hannah Hunnard) the main character Much Afraid, on her journey with the Shepherd to the High Places, is always scraping together her little rebellions and fears into an altar and offering them up. The pile gets consumed by fire and she is left with a pebble in the ashes. She collects these pebbles along her journey to remind herself of the Shepherd's faithfulness to his promises, and to remind herself of what she has laid down.
Upon reaching the last leg of her journey she finds herself in a valley with an altar laid out before her. She discovers that the final act of obedience requires the full surrender of her need for human love...and acceptance. This sacrifice takes more that she can do herself so she asks to be bound to the altar and the priest of the altar reaches into her heart to tear out the weed of human love. After she awakens in a cave..she pours out all her pebbles..raked from the ashes of her surrender and they are jewels..treasure beyond measure.

What was I thinking ....that Christ could face the cross..in the garden and struggle til he sweat blood..saying not my will..but thine be done...and what..I get to blithely enter into the will of God with very little effort? Minor sacrifice..discomfort...and pain?
Jesus..who knew no sin..became sin...took it all on...bore it for all to see...so I could hide...keep things secret...pretend...succeed...prove I was good and worthy...of fame fortune..full of talent..wisdom and grace...

James Langteaux, in the book God.net reminds us that God says in his word to:
"take up your cross daily...not your golf bag... and follow him."
Am I doing that?
Following Him?
Or am I re-writing the script?
How much has been lost on the editing floor?
Is the movie nothing like the book?
God have mercy!

Can it be done?
As Sigmund Brouwer puts it in the title of his book:
" Can the Real Jesus Still Be Found?"

That's what we are called to.
Did you ever ask the question...
Where was Jesus going?
Can I follow?
Am I following?
What is my cross?
Is it an altar?

What does this mean for my life?

Doesn't look too promising....sounds terribly uncomfortable.

The cross wasn't the end however...

Out of the ashes of death...of surrender....there emerged a treasure beyond all treasure.

There emerged a blazing trail...

Back.

Talk about a treasure map.

There is a way back...to complete communion with God our Father.

That which was lost.
Is found.
Again.
That which was stolen.
Is restored.
That which was broken.
Reforged.
What died.
Lives.

Yes?

YES!

So today...I scrape together my petty rebellions...my fears...my will...

On the altar.

I surrender.

And trust from the ashes....he will bring forth treasure of his making, his design...

Lasting treasure.

And tomorrow..and tomorrow and tomorrow...

Through the fire..out of the ashes...

Following...

Him.